Usual disclaimers.
The Day after the Party
Apologies to Clement Clarke Moore
By Tels-Cha'ris
T'was the day after the party, and all through the base
Not a Tok’ra was stirring, not one showed their face;
The glasses were left on the table with care,
Next to the bottles of alka-seltzer still standing there.
Most of them snuggled right down in their beds,
While visions of karaoke danced in their heads;
And my host in her nightee, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a long undisturbed nap,
When from the tunnels there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
Grabbing robe, zat and ribbon I flew down the hall,
Finally reaching the room were we’d held the ball.
The lights from the disco ball spun round the room
With loud music again going boom, boom, boom, boom,
And what to my tortured eyes should I see,
But Anise and Delek having afternoon tea.
With a china tea service, jam scones and cream,
I knew in a moment things weren’t what they seem.
I watched as they ate one after the other,
And I heard my host mutter within me ‘Oh brother!’
"Come join us my friend,” I heard Delek say as
Anise echoed his comment, “Yes join us this day
The scones they are fresh and the jam is divine
And the tea is from England and really tastes fine."
So I sat there beside them, we sat there we three
Well six with the hosts, but they’re sleeping you see
We tried then with jam first and then with the cream,
And some with just butter and some dunked in the tea.
The debate it continued for the rest of the day
Whether jam, butter or cream first was the way.
As I took yet one more, I heard Selmak cry
“What on Earth are you doing?” and then heard her sigh.
The three of us turned and looked not once by twice,
As her clothes were on backwards, not tidy or nice;
A big sack of rubbish she had flung on her back,
And she didn’t look happy – had she lost the knack?
Her eyes no longer twinkled! Her dimples not merry!
Her cheeks now like roses, her nose like a cherry!
Her droll little mouth was drawn up in a snarl,
She looked less like a Tok’ra and more like a Targ.
The dry ice from earlier still came from beneath,
And the smoke it encircled her head like a wreath;
She glared at us sat there, her eyes started to glow
She wasn’t best pleased that much we all know.
She was shaking her head, in disgust we all guessed
And I laughed when I saw her, in spite of myself;
A glint in her eye and a twist of her head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
She spoke not a word, but went straight to her work,
Clearing up all the mess; then turned with a jerk,
And laying a finger aside of her nose,
Said “You know those were mine without doubt I suppose?”
She pulled away the remains of the jam scones and cream,
And sent us back to our beds, once more now to dream.
But I heard her exclaim, ere we got out of sight,
"That’s the last time I leave my things out all night!”
The following morning the three of us met
Outside Selmak’s office, to repay our debt
Anise had been baking, Delek had made jam
And the cream I had got in the post from my Mam.
She greeted us gently, she didn’t seem cross
But that was because she knew she was the boss.
She berated us soundly and accepted the gift
Then sent them packing – she told me to wait.
She looked at me hard then tipped me a wink
“So this whole party was your idea then I think.
The punch had been spiked even though it was nice
And the food was too rich and too full of spice.”
I let my host cop it; it was all her idea,
Making Tok’ra act like humans at the turn of the year.
Selmak finished her lecture and said with a grin
“So when’s the next party – I quite liked the gin.”
The end